I’m not sure why, but it just so happens that all – without exception – relationships of my acquaintances that started on the Internet seem to be a great deal for men and not so great for women. Time and time again, I see a quality woman in her 20’s, 30’s or 40’s hooking up with a mediocre guy through one of the online dating sites.

These are good looking educated ladies with career, financially independent, well-traveled, and well-read. They are beaming with joi de vivre, with lots to offer. Each and every one of them is what anyone would call a “catch.”

The men are ordinary at best, often encumbered with student loans and child support payments. Some are stuck in dead-end jobs. Others still act like “players” but expect the woman to pick up the tab on dinner date or a weekend getaway. Invariably, they consider themselves better than the woman and somehow entitled, deserving a partner who will help them out of the rut they’re in.

I see women settling for so little, content with scraps from someone else’s table. Is it desperation? Is it because of the biological clock ticking? Is it because true quality males are so hard to come by? It used to be that society pressured women into marriage in college, but times have changed and that’s no longer the case. So why, oh why is this happening? Is the Internet the reflection of the real world?

As an old hag with lots of relationship experience, most of it bad, but … still, experience, I want to tell all my fabulous women friends to aim for the stars and not pick the low hanging fruit. The guys I see you marrying, buying houses for, supporting financially, raising their children – these guys will drag you down. Ball and chain is what they are. Good looks and good sex and a fleeting thing. Then, what you’re left with is a loser that you’ll carry on your back through life, a loser who will disrespect you and resent you because you’re successful and he’s not.

Look in the mirror, take a good inventory of all your assets and great qualities. Then, look out for Number One. There’s certainly more than one fish in the sea, so don’t settle for the bottom dwelling carp. Wait for your marlin. And it is always so much better to be alone and a master of your destiny than to cling onto a loser who will suck you dry in more than one way. Peace out!

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