Madame Eva’s Morbid 2013 Predictions

I posit that the following five men will meet their maker in the year 2013, only two of them regretfully so:

1. Thai king Bhumibol — because he’s been in poor health for many years and because he’s old and frail

2. Hugo Chavez — because his Cuban cancer cure is not working or he wouldn’t need that many rounds of therapy

3. Stephen Hawking — because his incurable progressive disease is bound to eventually extinguish the last glimmer of his illustrious life

4. Pope Benedict XVI — because not much has changed in the corrupt and conniving Vatican since the times of Borgias; furthermore, the cardinals already got away with murder once in recent history when they assassinated John Paul I

5. Fidel Castro — because if I had the power, I would have gladly “wished him into cornfield” decades ago, before he bestowed the everlasting misery (called “Cuban Revolution”) on 3 generations of citizens and ran a country of 11 million into the ground (“Ya es hora, camarada”)

 

Update #1: Hugo Chavez died on March 5, 2013 (one out of 5 accuracy — nothing to write home about)

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